The Home of Steven Barnes
Author, Teacher, Screenwriter


Sunday, April 17, 2005

Healing the Wounded Heart

Let's finish up on the heartspace for right now, so that we can move on.  If you take responsibility for this chakra/aspect of your life, you can probably heal any other damage.  Look at it this way: if  you have a four year old child, very few emotional problems cannot be healed with enough love and hugs.  You need to create a connection to that younger self within you, so that  your outer actions connect to  yoru inner needs.  Some common ways people screw themselves here:

1) Giving everything to their children, saving nothing for themselves.  This will lead to the parents becoming grasping, needy, and resentful later, pushing those children away.

2) Expecting other people to know what you need.  We can't read your mind, and you can't read ours.  You have to communicate what you need.

3) Expecting other people to fill your emotional needs.  No.  This you must do yourself.  I remember a line from a Holly Hunter movie, "Broadcast News" was it?  Anyway, this one insecure guy says "wouldn't it be great if needy were a turn-on?" Well, except for the fact that it would turn the entire reproductive game upside-down, yeah, maybe.  Strength, centeredness,      ENERGY is what is attractive.  Men and women modulate this energy differently, but that's the game.  Fortunately, energy doesn't belong to us.  All we need do is get our egos out of the way, and there is a river of living energy we can tap into .  Yeah-- "All we need do."  Obviously, it isn't an easy task, or everyone would have limitless energy, not just a few spooky old yogis.

4) Not meditating.  Meditation is free, and so incredibly important that it should be compulsary.  I feel so sorry for my wounded friends who complain about fatigue, or sorrow, or grief, but won't go into their hearts and do the house-cleaning that would set them free.  The door to their dreams is in the last place they want to look--within them.

5) Having their child and adult selves in proper configuration.  The role of the adult self is to build the garden walls high, sweep out the broken glass, prune the thorns from the roses, and keep the pumas at bay.  The job of the child is to dance and sing.  Too many times, we put our children out to earn a living while our adult selves sulk and bitch and moan.  This is prostituting ourselves.  We must never sacrifice our dream of a happy life.  Either do the thing you love, or love the thing you do.  Either way works.  To do neither is emotional suicide.
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Just some thoughts.  Next, we move on to the throat chakra, and communication.

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