The Drunken Monkey

I have a friend who has crashed through one career opportunity after another.  The failure of the enterprises is always the fault of the other people.  In his eyes, they are all fools and Knaves. Really?  And why exactly is it that that is the best he can ever do...?
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I knew a woman who thought all men were dogs.  She was certain of this, because she had been married seven times.  Really?  And what was the only thing in common in all of her marriages.  by the way--she was a therapist.  Hope to God she didn't specialize in relationships.
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I have a friend who listens to right-Wing talk radio every day, for hours a day.  Her marriage is pretty much a dead issue, and the voices of Limbaugh and Hannity and Savage et al are probably the strongest, most comforting masculine voices in her head.  She sees the world in black and white, and her emotions are in such a snarl that she fears she is driving her own children away.  (By the way--I'd bet a steady diet of Air America wouldn't be much better)
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I deal with the voices in my head that say I can't, I shouldn't, I mustn't, it is too dangerous, it is too late, I am too old, I don't have the talent or the ability or the opportunity.  They chew at my self-confidence.  They attempt to devour me.  I must not let them win.
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We all must come to grips with the way we communicate with others, with ourselves.  The voices in our heads are programmed by our envirnoments.  They are the sum total of the experiences we have had, the teachers and critics.  The terrible, wonderful thing is that those voices are just trying to protect us, to keep us from harm.  You know what?  We can't always control the voices.  They are what the Chinese call the "Drunken Monkey", the nattering that we can't turn off.  Here's an experiment.  Try it now.  Stop for two minutes and just listen to the voice in your head.  Go ahead.  Do it.
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You know the voice you just heard saying: "what voice?  I don't hear a voice!"  That was the voice.  Meditation helps us calm it.  But one thing that you can do to minimize its effect on your life is to take greater care in what you say.  The words that pass the gate of your lips CAN be controlled, even if the voices in your head cannot.  Any words that add to the sum total of love in the world can be considered empowering. Those that chip away at your self-esteem, that demonize others, that lable people in groups rather than deal with them as individuals ("Those Liberals" "Those rich people" "those blacks" "those whites" "those gays" etc.) are probably the kinds of words that lead to pain, words that project our own insecurities upon others. 
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My friend who considers all his former partners to be fools and knaves has a raving sense of inadequacy, covered by a superiority complex.  The lady who thinks all men are dogs is actually terrified that she is worthless, incapable of attracting and holding a worthwhile mate.  She will probably try being a lesbian at some point, and discover that she is creating awful relationships there, too.  At which point she will give up and try cats.
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I fight every day, every single day, to stay on the healthy, positive track.  And I deal with my demons.  When things are going well, its easy.  But when the checks are late,  when the projects don't work, when I can't get the meetings, when the reviews are bad, the voices in my head start up again, and again.  I have to stop, breathe.  Listen to my heartbeat.  Find the light within my spine, and pull it up.  Stir up the mud and drain it out of my base chakra, or any of the hundred other metaphors I've created to clarify my emotions and set my mind at ease.  To quiet the voices.  You must find your own way of doing these things, because ANY time you work to move your life from one level to the next, you will encounter the demons.  And they speak in the voice of a drunken monkey.