Forbidden Kingdom and racial images

Someone asked me what I thought of "Forbidden Kingdom" (the Jackie Chan/Jet Li movie) with its white star, in the light of "21". Or "A Mighty Heart."
Or that 9/11 movie, or any other film where the race of the character is changed to white supposedly due to "Color Blind Casting" or some other such
lie. Well, obviously, what it is is an attempt to reach the largest audience. Human beings are tribal (doesn't that sound so much better than
"racist"?). People are more inclined to see something if there are emotional anchor-points connecting the actors to the audience. Race is one of
those, don't you dare doubt it. No one wants to admit it, but it's the simple truth. That said, the white kid in "Kingdom" holds the role of the
clueless kid who is trained by the masters. Oh, what the heck...why not? I mean, we all know why we'll go see this movie...for the supposedly fabulous
fight scene between Jackie and Jet. All else is dross. Cast a cow, if they want to.
What WILL disgust me is if he has a romantic dalliance with a beautiful Asian girl. While, of course, Jackie and Jet are "above such things." The human hindbrain can be frustrating.
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The subject of seduction came up. An interesting one, to be sure. Let's make it clear that we're not talking about courtship, which may or may
not include premarital bedroom shenanigans. Seduction is the art of making sexual contact with another human being--the question of the
ultimate relationship status isn't really relevant. Clearly, the "art" of seduction is different for males and females. Women can usually manage
to get sex whenever they want to...if they don't care about a relationship afterwards. Men are just that desperate. Guys often set out to dangle
the signs of "potential relationship" in front of a woman, complete with suggestions of his net worth and social mobility. I remember reading a
book applying some fairly sophisticated psychological theory to "making a man fall in love with you." To me, this is the same as those "Speed
Seduction" books and courses. Same ethical level.

The real question is: how can men and women satisfy their sexual needs (separate from a committed relationship) while remaining ethical? Most of
us have had encounters that we later regretted. Others have had missed opportunities where it only dawned on you after you left the party that
he/she was hitting on you. Learning to navigate these waters, being honest and compassionate, while still having fun, is a test of mind and heart.
Personally, looking back over my life from the safety of being well and truly married, I can think about the experiences I've had and extract rules
that seem to work, that I would be happy to pass on to my son, for instance. I didn't pass rules for seduction to my daughter--I have to
be honest and admit that I love the line from EdTV: "Men are the gas. Women are the brakes." What I gave Nicki was a caution that until she could
support herself legally and ethically, she had no business messing with sexual energy. It is simply too powerful.

What would I tell Jason? Well...considering that I thought for about three years to figure out what I was going to tell Nicki, I suppose it would be
a good idea to start thinking about it.
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As strange as it may sound, my primary rule is to treat every woman the way I would want someone to treat my sister, my daughter, or my mother.
That is, if one can imagine one's sister, daughter, or mother having a lusty, healthy sexual life. I have no problem with such imaginings. This then
ties back to the idea of "Long term selfishness." That is, that there is nothing wrong with selfishness. The problem is SHORT TERM selfishness, where
people do things to cheat others. Long term selfishness demands that you protect the other party as well, because you want to come back and deal
with them again in days or years to come.

So long-term selfishness applied to seduction means that you have to
1) accurately perceive the values and needs of the other party.
2) determine if you can satisfy those needs ethically, without promising what you have no intention of delivering
3) honestly provoke, induce, or stimulate a sexual desire in the other party
4) project confidence that you can fulfill that desire
5) project the qualities that your object of desire finds intriguing and attractive.
6) provide a safe, comfortable space for the rendezvous
7) Deliver the goods. Remember--you want to handle yourself so that you could come back for seconds some day, right? That
means that you are honest, generous, caring, affectionate, respectful...and genuinely passionate and interested in HER, not just in someone to,
in the single most revolting phrase I've ever heard applied to sex, "dump a fuck in." Christ.
8) Provide mutual protection from STD, pregnancy, or emotional trauma.
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Here's another rule that I had during my dating years: never have sex with anyone you wouldn't take a call from a year later, at 3:00am in the
morning. If you don't like her enough to care about her life and welfare, exactly, precisely why are you jumping in the sack with her..?

Just wanted to clear the air about basic rules before any discussion of strategy and tactics.
And the question of the day is: what basic rules have you guys set up to control the sexual aspect of the Mating Game?