The Home of Steven Barnes
Author, Teacher, Screenwriter

Friday, March 28, 2014

How To Pick Up Girls!

There is a story about two monks walking in the woods.  They come to a stream.  A beautiful woman asks them if they will help her across.  They are of a sect forbidden contact with women, so the younger monk is shocked when the older one picks up the woman and carries her across, then sets her down on the far bank.

The two walk on for several miles, and then the young monk explodes: “I can’t believe you picked up that woman!” he says.
The older monk smiles mildly.  “I put her down on the river bank.  I can’t believe you’re still carrying her.”
We always do the very best we can with the resources we have. Today you have different resources than you had yesterday. A critical  distinction is between "responsibility" and guilt, blame, or shame. Response-Ability is literally "the ability to respond." Without that, you are adrift, your agency destroyed by negative emotion.  No one who has ever been born is better than you.  The only “cost” for living in this reality is giving up the notion that you are better than anyone else.   The only cost for forgiving yourself enough to drop your baggage and evolve is forgiving those who have damaged you.   

Forgiving is NOT forgetting.  It is NOT allowing them to hurt you again.
You don’t forgive others for their benefit, but for yours.  The only reason you cannot is fear that if you don’t, you will be hurt again.  That means there is no actual deep trust for your own soul and being.    Start with love.    Abandon the need to be better than others.  You are enough in and of yourself, without comparisons to others.  All comparisons to others are within the “dream” of life, not the reality.  It is fine to play such games, but they must not be mistaken for reality.   One of my mentors once said, “you can enjoy playing Monopoly, but don’t make the mistake of thinking you can live on Boardwalk or Park Place.”

Love yourself.  Forgive--but don’t take any shit, either.     Seek truth, taking balanced goals within the “dream” of life, and notice the results without being attached to them.   Remember: At every moment of your life, you’ve done the best you could with the resources you had.

And so has everyone else.



cool math games said...

Thank you very much for your post, it makes us have more and more discs in our life, So kind for you, I also hope you will make more and more excellent post and let’s more and more talk, thank you very much, dear.
happy wheels| friv|monster high| shooting games| tetris| 8 ball pool
cool math games| barbie games| friv4school| agario| fighting games

Unknown said...

Big Farm

Big Farm is an awesome multiplayer farm management game made by the Goodgame Studios.
Your mission is simple: Create a big farm, grow crops, breed animals,
and become the richest farmer of the universe. Enjoy Goodgame's Big Farm!

Oanh Tr said...

Thank you so much for commenting, it is lovely and really makes my day!
wheely 8 games | zoxy 3 | twizlgames | papalouie 4

Oanh Tr said...

Thank you so much for commenting, it is lovely and really makes my day!
zoxy games |
friv 10 games | friv games | friv 100 play

Unknown said...

I enjoyed over read your blog post. Your blog have nice information, I got good ideas from this amazing blog. I am always searching like this type blog post. I hope I will see again.
friv 3
friv 4
kizi 2 games
zoxy games online| zoxy games
friv .org

Friv games said...

When you're tired, you want to relax after a stressful working hours, you need to have time to take care of the kids active.
Please visit our website and play exciting flash games.
Thanks you for sharing!
Moto X3M

phuctrankhang said...

Great website! It looks extremely professional! Keep up the excellent job!
Dress Up Games
Minecraft Games
Girl Games

superwings said...

Hurrah! In the end I got a website from where I can actually obtain helpful information regarding my study and knowledge.
Friv 2

healthy5419 said...

I like this post, and I guess they are happy to read this post, they will have a good website to create information, thank you for sharing it with me.
Friv 2019
Didi Games
Friv 1

dominictoretto said...

This post truly made my day. You can’t imagine just how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks.
Hooda Math
Didi Games

owenshaw7474 said...

I benefit from checking your site. Thanks for your time!
Manga Online
Manga Online
Read Manga Online
Read Manga Online