The Home of Steven Barnes
Author, Teacher, Screenwriter

Monday, October 26, 2009

A little assistance, Please...

I have been specifically requested to create a course adapting the 101/Lifewriting approach to MEN: male lives, raising and teaching sons/families, sexuality and ethical seduction, power relations, etc. And am almost ready to go into the studio and create it.

There are aspects of success, relationships and health/fitness that relate to BOTH males and females equally, but then there are some that frankly hit males harder, things that will trash them harder if they don't address the problems and potentials. And apparently, many of my readers feel I have something to offer here. I decided to do it: if it was, simultaneously, a trove of treasures I'm leaving for my son Jason, to be opened at Puberty if for some reason I'm not there. Simultaneously, I want it to be for all men, of any age, who feel that there is a missing piece of their inner or outer puzzle in terms of fitness/health, sex/relationships, and creativity/career/success. Needless to say if I were to get requests from women asking for one specific to them, I'd be happy to do so...but would probably co-create it with my wife.

ᅠI'd like some feedback on titles. Some examples:

1) 101 Things Father Never Taught His Son*

(because he probably didn't know)

2) 101 Lessons For Men*

(and the women who love them)

3) The Heroic Man

4) 21st Century Man

5) Manhood (a beginner's guide)

6) Advanced Manhood.

I'm looking for a title that is specific, a bit challenging, and maybe a little funny.

1) Do any of these titles appeal to you?

2) Are there others you would suggest?

3) What is the specific material you would like me to cover in such a course?



Marty S said...

The only one I personally care for is the first. As for suggestions how about something like "Pitfalls to success! A man's guide to avoiding them."

mjholt said...

I don't care for suggested the titles: they all seem derivative. I like Marty S's suggestion. However, I say you should go back to the drawing board on the title.

I am glad you are doing this. You do have many things to teach men. You are such a joy to visit with, that if you could get other men to be more like you, that would be so good. One thing I would like you to tell men: get over your childhood.

I am dealing with a business separation involving a man (in his mid-50's) who has a huge number of problems with his relationships with everyone. He was abused by his parents and perhaps sexually abused by his mom as a young child. He is always puffing up and being "manly" which just turns everything into a CF. His greatest "manly" things he does is drink heavily, brag on things that are bizarre, and put other people, particularly men, down to make himself feel better (I would guess). This is all very tiresome. I have come to the point where I just feel pity for him.

As a woman, I want to say that I feel very fortunate to be married to a man who is mentally healthy and understands success, relationships, and how he fits into the world. My father and most of my male relatives are the same way, as are my friends, including you!

Lester Spence said...

Assuming this gets to you quicker I suggested "Manhood: A Crash Course". The other titles don't pop.

Ethiopian_Infidel said...

"..he does is drink heavily, brag on things that are bizarre, and put other people, particularly men, down to make himself feel better (I would guess). This is all very tiresome. I have come to the point where I just feel pity for him."

I've learned through painful experience that it's dangerous to pity some people. Through combinations of bad genes and poor luck, some people are so screwed emotionally and morally, help's useless. Profoundly insecure folks such as mjholt's braggart often exploit sympathy, adding the would-be do-gooder to their long list of victims, emotional and otherwise.

Life Lesson 10X: Become a discerning character judge, judiciously select friends and "projects", and rationally allocate sympathy and pity.

Anonymous said...

Help being useless does not preclude pity.

Scott said...

1) No. 2) Secret Guy Knowledge 3) Pareto, balance, iron, writing to learn, public speaking, strategy....

Kami said...

Rory, writing from Kami's account:
I've been considering a project with the title "Hairy-Chested Enlightenment" if that gives you some ideas.


John said...

Cool! Here are some ideas:

Return of the Man

Manhood with Meaning

The Complete Man

The Ancient Art of Being a Man in the 21st Century

Lawrence Lycant Talbot said...

The Day My Nuts Dropped.

A Bartender's Guide To Testosterone.

Manhood And Other Mixed Drinks.

The OTHER Peter Principles.

Manhood: Now What?

The Manhood Movie: Lights, Action, Responsibility!

If You Thought Childhood Sucked, Wait 'Til You Start Paying Bills And Other Manly Perks.

Full Stride: A Romp Through Manhood.

Welcome To The Deep End Of The Pool.

Hey Daddy What Dat Dere? (a tip of the hat to an old Oscar Brown, Jr. song).

If Cassandra Had Only Been A Man What Would She Have Told Young Men?

Super Glue And Other Tips To Keep Your Manly Shit Together.

Diapers In, Diapers Out, The In-Between.

Guys: The No Bullshit Guide To Growing The Hell Up.

Thanks Dr. Spock, Now Get Me The Hell Out Of Infancy And Into Manhood.

Beer Farts, Cable & Universal Remote Controls: Well, There's More To It Than That.

Man Care And Feeding.

suzanne said...

must the name be so
testosterone laden!!!
aspeaking of the sugegstions here
though I agree
you're potential titles lack

Scott said...

The Other Peter Principles made me laugh.

Lobo said...

Caveman/Soccer Dad: Reconciling Who Men Are and Who Men Need to Be (Soccer Dad was the only modern archetype I could think of and probably not the best.)

To Be Man (at the risk of being TOO obvious, think "To Serve Man" from the Twilight Zone.)

Modern Manhood

The Manhood Rulebook

mjholt said...

E-I, Thank you for your comment. You are right. While "Help being useless does not preclude pity" (from anonymous), sometimes pity precludes moving forward, which "enables" (AA term) him to self-destruct while harming many including my family.