The Home of Steven Barnes
Author, Teacher, Screenwriter

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Moving On


Yesterday was intense. My wife’s mother, Patricia Stevens Due, passed away after an extended and courageous battle with cancer. All prayers and good thoughts gratefully accepted.
What can we learn from the tragedies in our lives?
Countless words have been written on this subject, but I thought to add a few of my own...

1) Tell the people you love that you love them. Every day. Don’t kid yourself: one of these “I love yous” will be the very last. Make them count.

2) Take better care of yourself. Stop pretending your body won’t fall apart if you don’t care for it. It is so sad to see people suddenly “surprised” to learn that fifty years of neglecting their bodies has created a pit so deep they can’t climb out.

3) Dance every day. Life has pain, and sorrow, and regret. But also joy, and passion, and promise. We must allow ourselves to experience both. Never miss a chance to be happy.

4) Imagine yourself on your death bed. What are the stories you wish you had told? The things you wish you had done? The person you wish you had become? The skills you wish you had acquired? Whatever they are, GO FOR IT!
How does this relates to my life, today?
1) I start my day, as always, helping my son learn to control his mind and body. I am specifically giving him the gifts I wish I had learned from my own father. I’ve compiled most of the core techniques driving my life in the 101 Program.

2) I will pamper my wife, and make sure there is no stone unturned in helping her deal with the grief of loss, as well as the relief that her mother is beyond pain.

3) I will work diligently on my body. Yoga today. Move closer to the core of my existence, through the avenue of the flesh.

4) I will work on my business. Crafting the safety net that protects my family and secures my future.

5) I will work on my art. Today, I’m back on the script project (I’ll be exploring that with you again tomorrow, writers!) I need to clarify the “meaning” of the entire work, the core philosophy that will be expressed, the thesis and antithesis that will be at war throughout the whole. That requires intense thought, and as we all know, thought is something we work pretty hard to avoid.

Am I avoiding it by writing this? Oops! Let me get to work.


Anonymous said...

Please accept my condolences. May she rest easy in the company of her ancestors.

Anonymous said...

I am sorry for your family's loss. May the the good lord bless her and keep her safe. Langdon

Shady_Grady said...


Terry H said...

Condolences to you, Tananarive and Jason. what is more valuable than family? My heart goes out to you.