The Home of Steven Barnes
Author, Teacher, Screenwriter


Friday, August 30, 2013

Kill the monster while it's small

What I do with Jason’s morning ritual is to implant generative patterns he can use to guide and evaluate his behaviors.  The “morning ritual” is critical, and I’m hoping to implant a habit for lifetime (although the specific techniques will shift, I’m sure.)
The most important things this morning were:
1) interrupting the non-resourceful behaviors. (Bowing, sitting seiza)
2) Anchoring love and confidence (morning hug)
3) Calming his energy levels (10 “omm” patterns with deep breathing”
4) Reminding him of his resourceful states, principles and values (Musashi’s principles, “the rules”
5) “Killing the monster while it’s small”—“swish” patterns, envisioning a negative behavior and SMASHING the image with an expanding image of a hyper-resourceful behavior.  Again and again.  Faster and faster.
7) When   highest-energy, positive, and centered he pumps his fist and yells “YES!” anchoring in that positive state.

“Killing the monster while it’s small” means to attack the root of a negative behavior.   Before he has what we call a “brain fart” he will begin to distort his body into odd positions.  His vocal quality will shift, he starts acting goofy.  This leads to a hyper-excitable and sensitive state in which “he wants what he wants” and the slightest disappointment can trigger upset. 

By this time, it is too late for conscious control.  But BEFORE this point, he can take control again by sitting upright and calming his breathing, doing a “swish” pattern, or pumping his fist and saying “YES!”  NOTE: the efficiency of a fired “anchor” is in direct relationship to how much you have “powered it up” earlier, and the uniqueness of the anchor.  

He is learning to recognize the early stages of a tantrum, while “the monster is still small” and crush it, replacing it with a positive, resourceful state.  This is very similar to recognizing when he is at a “3” on a scale of 1-10, “3” being a little tickle in his bladder, but an “8” meaning he has 30 seconds to get to a toilet.

If you study your own mind, looking at any unresourceful behavior, you’ll notice that there are precursive actions, feelings, and thoughts.  Smoking.  Cheating.   Writers’ block.  Begin to examine how you “do” them. What you do first, second and third to “accomplish” an unresourceful state.
Trust me…you have a recipe for any state or behavior in your life, positive or negative.   And if you can deliberately change that recipe by changing your physiology, mental focus or emotional state (I work all three with Jason!)  you can derail the process. 

Be a dragon-slayer.

But kill it in the nest

Namaste,
Steve

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