Asians in the media

"Seven Pounds" opened a little soft, with Jim Carry's "Yes Man" beating it handily on Friday. Oops. I have this strong suspicion that the "Black Man Sex Curse" will hit again. So what exactly is it that goes wrong with studios, artists, and audiences around this issue?

1) If the film isn't good...then what exactly is it that makes it so predictable that this single element (black male sexuality in films) screws the quality of a film up, when this doesn't seem to happen to white males?

2) If the film IS good (and, of course, there is no objective measurement for most quality issues in film) then what is it that happens in the mind of the audience and critics that makes them reject it?

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I honestly think that the truth is somewhere in-between the two. That things go wrong in pre-production due to cognitive dissonance and emotional mixed messages, as well as hidden conflicts. Scripts aren't as well vetted, and there simply isn't a vast library of previous images that guide the director, writer, and actor. Everyone knows they're swimming upstream, but it rarely gets talked about with the kind of honesty and clarity that would be necessary: everyone's too polite, enlightened, and liberal to grasp the totality of what they're up against: that the problem isn't "them" and never was. It is US.

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Audiences love Will Smith (and Denzel, and whoever) but feel uncomfortable with certain images, and don't know why. Even the physiognomy of watching thick black lips kissing causes discomfort: it just looks wrong. But that is impossibly politically incorrect, so, what happens when something onscreen is getting too uncomfortable? You say: "it's only a movie. Only a movie..." and the instant you do that, you are yanked out of it, and are looking at structure, effects, lighting, etc: the illusion is ruined. And NO movie is perfect enough that, if you lose the illusion, you can't find flaws.

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Now, this doesn't mean that if you didn't like the film you are prejudiced. Heck, there is no such thing as a film that is universally loved. All I'm saying is that if you look at just a couple of things:

1) PG and up level love scenes.

2) Black actors

3) 100-million box office

You get a really weird statistical blip. Why? Opinions vary. But my theory the "10% disconnect" in identification between racial groups (especially between the males of those groups) has had predictive capacity for thirty years. Soon, I strongly suspect, that will no longer be true. Until then, it still stings.

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Someone mentioned the lack of Asian images in film and television. Man, is that true. And when they pop up, we see the same cooning tendencies that we saw in early black images. On "Dexter" the Asian lab rat is a total geek-pervert. On "Mad TV" poor Tommy Lee is endlessly mocked for his sexless, powerless aspect. Sigh.

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For years, I've thought that the reason there isn't more "push-back" from these communities is that they simply aren't as hungry for the images. Why? Because since I was a kid, every community with a large Hispanic or Asian population had movie theaters and television stations showing made in Japan or Hong Kong or Mexico. Want to see yourself treated like a hero, or a heroine? Take a short trip to the Toho La Brea or Sing Lee theaters and watch Zato Ichi or Wang Yu or Sonny Chiba or Angela Mao. (BTW--always found it interesting that Westernern opined that Asian women were consigned to second-class status in Asia, compared to America and Europe, but Asian women were presented as valid heroines, totally equal or superior to males, in their television and cinema. There's a thesis in there somewhere).

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ﾠﾠI don't know who the heroes of the Spanish-language films were: didn't go. But from the posters they were cops, doctors, politicians, wealthy businessmen, poor farmers. In other words, the full spectrum of human activity. Now, they were STILL denied the images of acceptance by American society, but that's a little like saying they had to import their food from overseas, because American farmers won't grow their native dishes. Well, your body doesn't care where the protein came from, even if the ego stings a little. If there had been a thriving African film industry, and movie theaters that showed them, I suspect I would have been there every weekend.

It still irritates me that I see Asian newswomen on every channel in the country, and about 1/10 as many Asian news men. I accidentally ended up in a hotel where an Asian news conference was taking place up in Portland, and went out of my way to ask what they thought about this. As I suspected, they felt it related to an American (read: white) concept that while Asian males are intelligent, they lack authority. And authority is what stations want from newsMEN. NewsWOMEN are often measured by their twinkle and sex appeal.

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At least, that was their opinion. I've heard many Asians complain about the stereotypes inflicted upon them: cold, unemotional, "model minority," intelligent, successful, Kung-Fu wizards...wait a minute...those last ones aren't bad. I mean, if you've got to have stereotypes, those are the kind to have. I LOVED when the Right attacked Obama for being an "intellectual elitist." WHAT? Damn! Thought I'd died and gone to heaven. Why the hell couldn't blacks have had that stereotype when I was a kid? I doubt they would have dumped me in the slow reading group, that's for sure.

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In research for several projects. For one, I need to verify my impression that there was no real law or punishment for murdering slaves (other than destruction of property.) Can anyone verify so much as a single case where a white person was tried, convicted, and punished for such a killing? Remember: just being arrested or tried isn't enough. Nor would conviction for a lesser offence. We're talking execution, or LONG incarceration. There were several cases where the perp "escaped" (hah hah) but despite considerable searching, the only conclusion I can come to is that there was no real charge of murder for killing slaves. Please: any counter-evidence?

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Got this yesterday...

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http://buffalobeast.com/133/dullemite.htm

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By IAN MURPHY

Let's face it: Barack Obama just isn't funny. He's sort of gangly and he has big ears. That's it. But the man's going to lead the free world; he must be effectively derided and satirized. Anything less would be un-American! But Obama's race has been a challenge to the work-a-day satirist, too. What can we say? How far is too far? Does mocking the Obama administration come with a free membership to a white power group? And does that membership entitle one to discounts at Sam's club? It's hard to say.

There's no doubt that Barry represents a change in American politics, and to help you, the reader and terrified pundits, with the apparent changes inherent an Obama presidency, here's a convenient list of cowardly, borderline acceptable ways of commenting on "the first black president." Enjoy, you bigot:

The first president who wouldn't look completely ridiculous with a bald head.

The first menthol presidency.

The first president to not be able to hail a cab.

The first president who won't smell like a wet dog after swimming.

The first president who can't get head lice—no matter how unclean or inarticulate, according to his Vice Persident.

The first president to move second if he were a chess piece.

The first president to die first in an action film.

The first president who'd even consider using mayonnaise as a hair treatment product.

The first president at risk of developing Sickle-cell anemia.

The first president that must pretend to be bad at bowling, because seeing that black ball smash those white pins, would frighten retirees in gated communities.

The first president whose hip-hop sales would increase if he were shot.

The first president who could conceivably have hip-hop sales—aside from William Howard Taft, who recited his first State of the Union in bombastic 12-bar freestyle.

The first president to be romantically involved with a black woman—that he didn't own!

The first Huxtable president.

The first president whose offspring have the statistical mortality rate of children in Bangladesh.

The first president who could be pulled over and beaten by police simply for driving a nice car. And Air Force One? Forget-about-it!

The first president whose uniformed attackers would be acquitted of all charges—even if it was caught on video. ("I thought he was reaching for a gun, but it was just hope!")

The first president who can make white women uncomfortable in elevators.

The first president who wouldn't think putting chicken on waffles was some horrible mistake.

The first president whose black children weren't a tightly held secret.

The first president who wouldn't look out of place on a box of instant rice, pudding or Cream of Wheat.

The first president that Don Imus just isn't allowed to talk about.

The first modern president who won't feel totally guilty while watching "Roots".

The first president to flinch at the title "Minority Whip."

The first president to cut pork from the budget strictly for barbeque concerns.

The first president capable of moderating his policies, yet unwilling to moderate his volume at the movies.

The first president who, no matter how well he performs, can't be called "one of the good ones."

The first president to make the White House feel insecure about its manhood.

The first president who can call another man "baby" and sound cool doing it.

The first president who can be admiringly referred to as "Big Brother."

The first president whose head can be Photoshopped onto NBA slam dunk contest winners.

The first president to make the position "White House Sunburn Advisor" seem doubly implausible.

The first president who can recite Chris Rock's "they spinnin'!" bit without getting beaten up.

The first president to deny the deliciousness of watermelon—for political reasons.

The first president to be less than a thousand generations removed from his African DNA.

The first president who's forbidden to date Pat Buchanan's daughters.

The first president to diminish the accomplishments of George Washington Carver—since Jimmy Carter.

The first president who's deft at employing the suffix "izzle."

The first president to make Wayne Brady seem inexcusably black.

The first president to effectively deflect criticism by saying, "It's a president thing; you wouldn't understand."

The first president to rightly believe that sandals should never be worn with socks.

The first president to truly think grits are an acceptable foodstuff.

The first president who can sing both the Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney parts of "Ebony and Ivory."

The first president to make Bill Clinton look like Edgar Winter.

The first president who can both pop, and lock, without the approval of congress.

The first president to make the economy more palitable with hot sauce alone.

The first president who could be impeached simply for barking like DMX.

And finally, the first president to be mercilessly pigeonholed because of his melanin.

We hope this has been both educational and fun. But remember, kids, if you laughed, you too are a racist!

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